Ke$ha Ain't Going Nowhere!

She doesn't have the best singing voice around - as evidenced by this AMA performance - but Ke$ha has a message for critics in the latest issue of Complex: She ain't going nowhere!
And while she's sticking around the music business, she might as well do so on roller skates...

In an interview with Complex, Ke$ha touches on everything from being turned on by pocket change to being compared to Lady Gaga. Read a few excerpts below:

What turns you on that people would find bizarre?
A bag full of quarters.

Is there a specific type of beard that you're into?
I like the rugged, mountain-man beard, personally. I won't discriminate, but my favorite kind of beard is one that could potentially be a homeless beard. Like, you actually have to discover if they're un-groomed for a reason. I like a really unkempt beard.

Are you tired of the comparisons people draw between you, Lady Gaga, and Katy Perry?
I actually think that's cool. Out of that group of chicks, I'm the new bitch on the block, so I'm still getting used to being compared to some of the biggest pop stars in the world, but I don't take any offense to it. That just means people know my records.

 

Rihanna Wants (Male) Kids With Matt Kemp

Is Rihanna ready to settle down?
In the December issue of Interview, Kanye West interviews the singer, who is much happier these days, and hints that motherhood may be on the horizon.
"It could be a year from now," she said. Seriously?

MOTHER-TO-BE: Rihanna is, just not anytime soon ... probably.

Of course, "It could be 10 years from now. Whenever is right, I don't really plan the age," Rihanna tells the magazine. "I mean, I have a lot of other stuff to accomplish before I think about kids. Whenever the time is right, I'll just know."
This much is certain: the pop star has found a great match in L.A. Dodgers outfielder Matt Kemp in January, and wants an all-male household with him.
"If I had a girl, she'd probably be really rebellious," the singer laughs, alluding to her Good Girl Gone Bad ways. "She would be like a bundle of karma."
As for where she would raise her brood, Rihanna says she "would love to bring them up in Barbados," though her job may prevent that from happening.
"I can't live that far away from everything now, without kids," she explains. "I certainly couldn't raise kids and [have a career] with the schedule I have."
She's 22, fortunately, so she's got time.

The Spoiler Corner: Scoop on The Vampire Diaries, Glee and More!

Forget turkey and stuffing. We know what readers are truly craving over the Thanksgiving holiday:
Scoops and spoilers on your favorite shows. That's where our friends at TV Fanatic come in. Follow the links below for insight into The Vampire Diaries, Glee and more.

The Vampire Diaries spoilers: This CW hit is casting for a female reporter to play a character named Angel. She'll get her flirt on with Damon. Lucky gal.

Glee spoilers: The group will help Brittany believe in Santa Claus for its Christmas episode, while the local football championship will be decided on Glee's special Super Bowl installment.

Desperate Housewives spoilers: The future is not looking good for Paul Young.

True Blood spoilers: The HBO smash has promoted one actress and hired three more for the season ahead.

One Tree Hill spoilers: A significant character returns on November 29.

Amber Portwood's Baby Now Indiana's Problem

Teen Mom star Amber Portwood's daughter is now a ward of the state of Indiana, meaning her guardianship is determined by a judge and government agency.
It's the latest, most dramatic development yet in the ongoing saga of the MTV star, whose troubled, often violent life has played out on the popular MTV show.
Portwood and former fiance Gary Shirley appeared in an Anderson, Ind., courtroom Tuesday for an emergency child placement hearing concerning Leah.

It's official. Indiana has wrested control of Leah from Amber.

As the Department of Child Services assesses Leah's living situation, Leah, 2, remains under the state's control, even though she is staying with Shirley.
The Indiana Department of Child Services also supervised Amber Portwood's most recent visit with Leah at Gary's house, taking place Tuesday after court.
Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley declined to comment outside court.
Gary and Amber, whose violent altercations (which are basically one-sided, with him taking the pounding) appeared extremely friendly toward each other.
DCS will monitor Amber's progress in the wake of her felony battery charges, and determine if Gary's home is suitable for Leah to remain in permanently.
DCS has been probing Leah's living situation at Shirley's house and asked for changes that Shirley will comply with, one source close to the matter said.
Under Indiana law, if a child is found to be a "child in need of services" (CHINS) the child then becomes a ward of the state, which happened in this case.
Portwood gave Leah to Shirley recently, believing the toddler would be better off with him right now, given the demons she's battling. It was for the best.
Hopefully Clinton Yunker is there to comfort her in this tough time.

Michael Brea: Charged with Gruesome Murder

Michael Brea has officially been charged with as gruesome a crime as one can commit.
The small-time actor was discovered inside his Brooklyn apartment yesterday morning, covered in blood, clutching a bible and standing near the bathroom where police found his 55-year old mother's dead body. Reports indicate Yannick Brea had severe cuts on her head, countering sources who originally claimed she was decapitated.
Police had to subdue Michael with a taser.

Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly told The Associated Press that officers found the 31-year old actor - who appeared in Step-Up 3D - "in a bedroom... with a 3-foot sword."

After undergoing a psychiatric evaluation at a Brooklyn hospital, Brea was arrested on charges of murder and criminal possession of a weapon.

UPDATE: Neighbors tell The New York Daily News they heard Brea screaming at his mother "Sinner! Sinner! You never accepted Jesus!" around the time of the alleged attack.

Kate Gosselin Now Home-Schooling Troubled Kids

Jon and Kate Gosselin's troubled kids Collin and Alexis are reportedly "doing a lot better" since their surprising, recent expulsion from private school.
The six-year-olds were booted out of their Pennsylvania school and are currently being home-schooled by their famous (and controversial) mom.
Kate was forced to take over after Collin and Alexis' rage issues, including incidents of violence and bullying, continued to spiral out of control.

BEFORE THE RAGE: Collin and Alexis is simpler times.

The expulsion was a wake-up call for Kate, who is working to get their behavioral issues under control and providea more structured environment at home.
"The two kids are doing a lot better. It seems like they are happier now that they are receiving more attention to meet their needs," a source told Radar.
"Both Collin and Alexis are happy they are enjoying spending more time with their mother and also with (their dog) Shoka now that he has returned."
Kate and Jon Gosselin are on the same page when it comes to Collin and Alexis' structure for schoolwork and are directly addressing behavioral issues.
Jon and Kate hope that the troubled pair can even return to the same school next year to rejoin their brothers and sisters if things keep improving.
The kids' issues sparked fresh criticism over whether living their lives on TLC TV shows is hurting their development and causing behavioral woes.
Jon certainly believes it does, pleading with Kate to end it.
TLC and Kate have no such intentions of pulling the plug.
They're putting their differences aside now, though: "Jon and Kate are working to share time with the kids at Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's."

Lily Allen: Engaged to Sam Cooper?

Is Lily Allen engaged to her boyfriend, Sam Cooper?
That's the rumor going around, just weeks after tragically losing her baby six months into her pregnancy. Now magazine claims Cooper popped the question.
A friend of Allen's told the publication: "Everyone's so proud of Lily. She's made a list of how to get through what can only be described as a horrible tragedy."

Engaged or not, Lily Allen and Sam Cooper sure are happy.

"This is the most awful situation in the world and she's aware that nothing can take away the hurt she feels at losing her and Sam's baby."
"Last week, Sam told Lily he can't live without her and wants to go ahead with the wedding plans. This has given her a major boost."
So are they getting married or not?
Allen, who was also admitted to the hospital with a blood condition shortly after losing her first child, has said that she needs "time to heal."
"He's been very supportive but he's hurting like hell as too, so they had a long heart-to-heart and have planned a holiday somewhere quiet."
They added: "Lily's a fighter and says if she can get through this, she can get through anything." So basically, we have no clue if she is.
Either way, we wish the singer the best.

Kat Von D Loses Cat, Home in Fire

Kat Von D's life just went up in smoke.
The outspoken tattoo artist is mourning the loss of her cat Valentine, whom she lost in a house fire. "R.I.P. my little Valentine," she tweeted Sunday.
That's so sad, not to mention scary. The L.A. Fire department was called and arrived at 11:23 p.m. Sunday to battle what was a very strong blaze.

The cause of Kat Von D's house fire is still under investigation.

"Fire fighters encountered heavy fire with extreme smoke but they were able to knock down the fire," the captain said. "There was no one home."
"My house burned down last night with my cat inside," Von D, who has been dating Jesse James since August, explained early Monday morning.
"Finally get to sleep away the rest of today. Hope tomorrow is gentler," the L.A. Ink star said. "To gain everything, you must lose everything."
Good to see she's staying strong through this.

Angelina Jolie Will NOT Celebrate Thanksgiving!

Millions will delight in Thanksgiving festivities tomorrow. Angelina Jolie is not one of them, electing not to commemorate the genocide of Native Americans.
"Angelina Jolie absolutely hates this holiday and wants no part in rewriting history like so many other Americans," a friend of the actress tells PopEater.
Valid point, but pumpkin pie just tastes so good ...

NO THANKS-GIVING: Angelina Jolie is not a fan!

"To celebrate what the white settlers did to the native Indians, the domination of one culture over another, just isn't her style," the friend says. "[Jolie] doesn't want to teach her multi-cultural family how to celebrate a story of murder."
Not sure how many of us toast to murder at the dinner table on this day, but she prefers to think of herself as a citizen of the world, not just America.
Always extremely sensitive to suffering throughout the world, she's going to great lengths to make sure the Jolie-Pitt brood doesn't honor it here.
"Angelina gets so grossed out by Thanksgiving that she has made sure her family will not be in America this year on Thursday," an insider reports.
While Brad Pitt recently told Extra, "We'll whip up a turkey somewhere," a family friend tells me, "If Brad wants turkey, he'll have to cook it himself."
Well, that would likely be the case whether they observe the day or not. Dude is so annoying when he eats, you know she makes him do the work.

Willow Palin Lambasts Media, Praises Bristol

Willow Palin is not happy with the media. Must run in the family.
A week after her big sister, Bristol Palin, apologized for Willow's use of a gay slur on Facebook, the 16-year-old spawn of Sarah is sounding off solo.
In a statement to E!, Willow goes off on Facebook haters, scandalous "lies" in Life & Style and Bristol's run to the Dancing With the Stars finale.

Bristol, Sarah, Trig and Willow Palin with He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named.

"Today I am focusing on a special event - Bristol and Mark [Ballas]'s appearance in the Dancing With the Stars finals. Nothing will take away how proud we are of Bristol and her grit and determination that got her this far," says Willow Palin.
Then her attention turned to the "ridiculous" reports, namely a Life & Style story painting the wild child as a crazy, vodka-chugging drug dealer.
"It is disappointing to see people claim they know me to sell stories," she said.
"As for people accusing me of being at a party over a year ago, the accusations are ridiculous. The same people saying this were also the ones attacking my family on Facebook. Unfortunately some people have learned that there are publications that will pay money for stories, no matter how misleading."
"Nevertheless, I recognize that my family has been given a great honor and privilege to make a difference in this country, and even though I am just 16, more is expected of me," she continues. "That being said, I say this to Bristol and Mark (with a hat tip to Lady Gaga) - Just Dance!"
Awwww.
Notice she left out the bit about slinging dope in a Target parking lot. Eh eh? Just kidding. We're sure that didn't happen. Actually we're not sure, it very well may have. But you can't trust anything that Life & Style says either.

David Arquette: One Wild and Craaaazy Guy!

David Arquette has not lost it, people.
The actor may have been out partying all of last weekend and may have placed some misguided phone calls to Howard Stern, but the recently-separated actor explained why during an appearance on Lopez Tonight yesterday: that's just who he is.

"I've always been a wild man," he told the host. "My nickname was 'David Good Times.' I like running around, having fun... I like meeting people. I did that privately for a long time because I wasn't ever going out. Now, I'm in the nightclub business. I'm going out."
The modest actor also said he didn't care at all about what tabloids wrote.
"I am a fun-loving, great person," Arquette said. "I refuse to let these magazines vilify me, make me a demon. I am one of the best people you'll ever meet."

Tiger Woods: Creepin' on Random Hoes!

They say a Tiger can't change his stripes. Well, a year after Tiger Woods' infamous Thanksgiving weekend car wreck, which revealed his affair with Rachel Uchitel and ignited a mammoth sex scandal, the golfer is up to his old tricks.
No, not Joslyn James and Devon James. But similar tricks.
"He's seeing random girls, creeping around in a low-key way," Us Weekly quotes an alleged Tiger insider as saying. "I don't think you can call it 'dating.'"

PROWLIN'! Tiger is supposedly in the hunt (for tail) once again.

So basically, dude's on the prowl for cocktail waitresses all over Florida, but it's hard to call it dating when you get kicked out of the house at 6:30 a.m.
Oddly, this bogus report goes on to reveal Tiger's actual plans for Thursday one paragraph later: "The kids and his mom will join him for Thanksgiving."
His ex-wife Elin Nordegren, meanwhile, is "not dating, but is in great spirits," the source adds. Well, that's good to hear ... $110 million has to help.

Jennifer Grey Reflects on "Unbelievable" Dancing With the Stars Win

After having four neck surgeries and waging a fight against cancer, Jennifer Grey "didn't even think about winning" when Dancing With the Stars began.
When she was handed the Mirror Ball trophy Tuesday, the health woes the 50-year-old battled made it even sweeter. "This is so unbelievable," she said.
"I feel so grateful, so blessed, that I had this opportunity. I don't know that there's any experience that will ever be anything like this again."

Jennifer Grey and Derek Hough are this season's champions.

Grey's title was effectively sealed 10 minutes before the big reveal, when lightning rod finalist Bristol Palin was named the season's third-place finisher.
It came down to Jennifer and Kyle Massey, who she bested with two perfect scores Monday, and whose fan support wasn't expected to match Bristol's.
After weeks of debate about Palin's staying power thanks to an active fan base, in the end it was not quite enough to deny Jennifer what was hers.
Kyle Massey and partner Lacey Schwimmer knew it too.
"We didn't think we'd make it past the first week, so to make it to the finals and to place second behind Jennifer and Derek, who got perfect scores, means we were pretty close to perfection," Massey said after the show.
"Jennifer deserved to win. America got it right."
With partner Hough's help, Grey slowly made her way around the ballroom after the show to talk to the press with a ruptured disc in her lower back.
She sustained that Monday, and in between performances last night, Grey was in pain. An ice pack was strategically tucked into her dancing pants.
Grey credited her husband, actor Clark Gregg, and their 8-year-old daughter, Stella, for their undying support of her ballroom "immersion course."
"I've done nothing but sleep and take care of my injuries. They have been so amazing," says Grey. "My husband has been taking care of everything and my daughter has become so much more self-sufficient. It's been great for everyone."
"I found out my husband can cook!"
Sounds like a win-win to us!

Lee DeWyze Album Sales: Disastrous

Lee DeWyze seems like a very nice guy and certainly possess a lot of music talent. But these numbers speak for themselves:
The American Idol champion moved 39,000 copies of his debut CD in its first week of sales, making him the least successful Idol finalist in history. Not just champion, mind you. But finalist. Period.

Here's a look at the first-week sales figures, and Billboard chart ranking, for each American Idol winner and runner-up, over the show's first eight seasons. Best of luck, Crystal Bowersox, with your debut album, which drops on December 14.

Season 8
No. 11, Kris Allen, Kris Allen (80,000)
No. 3, Adam Lambert, For Your Entertainment (198,000)

Season 7
No. 3, David Cook, David Cook (280,000)
No. 2, David Archuleta, David Archuleta (183,000)

Season 6
No. 10, Jordin Sparks, Jordin Sparks (119,000)
No. 10, Blake Lewis, Audio Day Dream (98,000)

Season 5
No. 2, Taylor Hicks, Taylor Hicks (298,000)
No. 2, Katharine McPhee, Katharine McPhee (116,000)

Season 4
No. 2, Carrie Underwood, "Some Hearts" (315,000)
No. 4, Bo Bice, "The Real Thing" (227,000)

Season 3
No. 8, Fantasia, Free Yourself (240,000)
No. 52, Diana DeGarmo, Blue Skies (47,000)

Season 2
No. 1, Ruben Studdard, Soulful (417,000)
No. 1, Clay Aiken, Measure of a Man (613,000)

Season 1
No. 1, Kelly Clarkson, Thankful (297,000)
No. 20, Justin Guarini, Justin Guarini (57,000)

Kanye West Goes on Insane Concert Rant, Possibly Compares Matt Lauer to Child Abuser

Kanye West is out of his mind.
The rapper went on a VINTAGE Kanye rant last night in his New York concert, going off on everything from Taylor Swift and George W. Bush to the Today show.
Of the VMA debacle, he said "If I wasn't drunk, I woulda been on stage longer," then accused Swift of milking it, saying she "rode and rode" the wave of publicity.

Regarding the former President, West said his post-Katrina criticism of George Bush was "a BLATANT truth" ... then lambasted the media for demonizing Bush.
He also brought up the Today show drama again, reiterating his belief that Matt Lauer sabotaged him and ran a clip from his Q&A with Kanye out of context:
"Matt Lauer's not a bad guy I'm sure, but if you're a child being abused by a parent ... or a girl being abused by your boyfriend ... the greatest win that you could ever have is for that person to hit you in public. You SEE! YOU SEE! I TOLD YOU!"

Bristol Palin's DWTS Secret Weapon: Prayer

Bristol Palin finished third on the Dancing with the Stars finale.
Considering the scrutiny and controversy she fought through - not to mention her lack of experience dancing - it's pretty darn impressive for the 20-year-old.
Her secret to overcoming all that adversity? Prayer.

Palin, who fell just short behind Kyle Massey and winner Jennifer Grey on last night's finale, drew ire from some fans for advancing despite relatively low scores.
"It is faith that got me through this, just praying all the time and just relying on God and knowing that He is on our side and we'll get through this," she said.
"Just persevere, have confidence, and be willing to go try new things," she said, asked what she'll take away from this. "I've grown so much as a person."

Police to Question Denise Richards Over Alleged Charlie Sheen Harrassment

Even in divorce, Denise Richards can't get away from the mayhem Charlie Sheen leaves in his drunken wake.
Because the actor's ex-wife was actually present at dinner on the night Sheen allegedly went ballistic and eventually threatened the life of Capri Anderson - the porn star has said Richards left when she saw the evening turning into a night of "floozies" - police have contacted the actress.
Richards was also sleeping in the Plaza Hotel room across from her ex when cops arrived on the scene. She reportedly entered at some point and could have spotted evidence to be used in an investigation.

Two women, half a man.

Sources tell TMZ Denise plans to "fully cooperate."

Meanwhile, a police spokesman spoke to E! News and gave some background on just what the NYPD is looking into, based on charges Anderson has brought against her one-time date.

"She decided a month later the crime that was completed was harassment," the spokesman said. "She said he was shouting at her, knocking things off in the hotel room, acting irrational. She voluntarily locked herself in the bathroom and was not held against her will. She was not a victim of assault. She was not imprisoned in the hotel room."

Why didn't police initially investigate the events?

"When we responded, she didn't file a police report. She never said she felt in danger. Mr. Sheen voluntarily went to the hospital were he underwent a psychiatric evaluation."

Cops will also speak to Sheen about the incident at some point over the next couple days.

Perhaps an English teacher could do the same. This crazy dude needs serious grammar help!

Christy Martin, Boxing Legend, Accuses Husband of Shooting and Stabbing Her

Christy Martin is a boxing legend, the first female in her sport to cover Sports Illustrated. But now this brawler is truly in for the fight of her life...
... against both death and her husband.

Martin, who once appeared on the undercard of a Mike Tyson match, is recovering in a Florida hospital after being shot and stabbed yesterday.

While details are still coming in, TMZ reports the boxer stumbled out of her home after the incident, flagged down a car and was taken to get care by a passing motorist. Despite her injuries, Martin told authorities the man behind the attack was her 66-year-old husband and trainer, James Martin.

Police are now on the hunt for the man who made the mistake of thinking Christy Martin could be knocked out so easily.

Joe Jonas and Ashley Greene: Happy as Ever!

Following the announcement by Demi Lovato that she's seeking treatment for an abundance of personal issues, Joe Jonas and Ashley Greene have found themselves under unexpected fire.
Fans of the 18-year old singer initially jumped to unfortunate conclusions and blamed Demi's ex for dating Greene so soon after he and Lovato broke up. The criticism has since died down, allowing these two to focus on their relationship.
Which, sources confirm, is going extremely well.

Ashley Greene and Joe Jonas: Coffee today, a ring tomorrow?!?

E! News quotes a friend that says Ashley's parents have met Joe and simply adore him. Look for this couple to spend the holidays together.

"They are happy as ever right now," says the pal.

And, hey, no signs yet that Greene is corrupting Jonas in any way. So that's good.

Dancing With the Stars: Who Will Win?

Does Jennifer Grey deserve it because of the physical ailments she's overcome and the high scores she's consistently produced, week in and week out?
Does unheralded, charismatic Kyle Massey get the nod thanks to the rare blend of technical merit and fun he and Lacey Schwimmer bring to the table?
Does Bristol Palin deserve it because ... well, presumably people have some reason for stuffing the virtual ballot box for Sarah's daughter each Monday.
Who should win Dancing With the Stars this evening?

The real (and possibly rigged, depending on who you believe) votes are cast, but THG's poll is open! Weigh in and watch the results along with us later ...

Megyn Kelly in GQ: Foxy News Anchor!

Everyday on Fox News, Megyn Kelly reports from her America Live desk. Now, GQ has decided: she's hot!
The blonde "reporter" is featured in the magazine's latest issue, showing just how fair her skin is and and just how balanced her... nevermind.

Among the topics Kelly tackles in the interview is the old rumor that she carried on an affair with fellow anchor Brit Hume. Megyn says of this story:

"I think Brit knew how preposterous it was to anyone with two nickels in between their ears. The first thing he said at his retirement dinner was "I haven't been this honored since that rumor about me having an affair with Megyn Kelly went around."

Clearly, this is a woman unafraid to embrace her sex appeal. But is that the proper attitude for the lead daytime anchor on the country's most watched news network? You tell us: Megyn Kelly in GQ is...

Michael Brea Suspected of Decapitating Mother with a Samurai Sword

This is as bizarre and as heinous a story as we could possibly imagine.
Michael Brea, a small-time actor who once appeared on Ugly Betty, has been taken into custody for allegedly chopping off the head of his mother with a samurai sword.

According to police reports, cops arrived to an "extremely bloody" scene at Brea's Brooklyn home around 2:20 this morning and found the actor holding a bible. They had to subdue him via taser.

A neighbor recounted events, as he/she heard them, to WPIX 11: "I hear [Brea] chasing [his mother] through the house and he's just saying a bunch of [Bible] passages like, 'Repent, Repent, Repent.' I heard him chasing her through the house and I heard a loud scream and so I have my father call the cops."

The victim was found with her head sliced off. At the moment, Brea is undergoing a psychiatric evaluation and then will be handed over to the NYPD.

Clear the Road: Lindsay Lohan Regains License

Lindsay Lohan has regained the right to operate a motor vehicle. We are happy for her ... and scared bit for residents of Palm Springs, California.
The L.A. County Probation Department and officials at the Betty Ford clinic signed off this morning, so Lindsay can drive again. Special treatment?
Not so much. Officials allow this for people "at Lindsay's care and treatment level," though it's still odd, as her legal problems stem from driving.

SCARED? It's LiLo, we wouldn't blame you. [Photo: Pacific Coast News]

Meanwhile, Michael Lohan is so stoked about his daughter regaining her driver's license, dude gave her his own Mercedes Benz to tool around town in!
Not only is she planning on having Thanksgiving with dad, she's cruising around in the (very expensive) wheels MiLo lent her to prove his trust.
Michael dropped the convertible off Monday for her to drive as she pleases. How nice. We'd still keep a lengthy following distance ... but nice.

Taylor Swift Announces World Tour, Gets Serenaded by Dane Cook

Taylor Swift will soon be coming to an arena near you.
The artist has announced a whirlwind 2011 tour that will take her to 87 cities in 19 countries, beginning February 9 in Singapore.

What the heck is going on in this photo? Find out NOW!

“I’m so excited to go back out on tour again in 2011!” Swift said. “The Fearless tour was so much fun and even more unforgettable than I ever imagined, and I can’t wait to get back out and play my new music from Speak Now!"
We've listed all the tour dates and locations below.

• February 9 Singapore
• February 11 Seoul, South Korea
• February 13 Osaka, Japan
• February 16 & 17 Tokyo, Japan
• February 19 Manila, Philippines
• February 21 Hong Kong
• March 6 Brussels, Belgium
• March 7 Rotterdam, Holland
• March 9 Oslo, Norway
• March 12 Oberhausen, Germany
• March 15 Milan, Italy
• March 17 Paris, France
• March 19 Madrid, Spain
• March 22 Birmingham, UK
• March 25 Belfast, Northern Ireland
• March 27 Dublin, Ireland
• March 29 Manchester, UK
• March 30 London, UK
• May 27 & 28 Omaha, Nebraska
• May 29 Des Moines, Iowa
• June 2 & 3 Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
• June 4 Orlando, Florida
• June 7 Columbus, Ohio
• June 8 Milwaukee, Wisconsin
• June 11 Detroit, Michigan
• June 14 & 15 St. Paul, Minnesota
• June 18 Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
• June 21 Buffalo, New York
• June 22 Hartford, Connecticut
• June 25 Foxborough, Massachusetts
• June 30 Greensboro, North Carolina
• July 1 Knoxville, Tennessee
• July 2 Louisville, Kentucky
• July 8 Charlotte, North Carolina
• July 9 & 10 Atlanta, Georgia
• July 14 Montreal, Quebec
• July 15 & 16 Toronto, Ontario
• July 19 & 20 New York, New York
• July 28 Grand Rapids, Michigan
• July 29 Indianapolis, Indiana
• July 30 Cleveland, Ohio
• August 2 & 3 Washington, DC
• August 6 Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
• August 9 & 10 Chicago, Illinois
• August 13 Lexington, Kentucky
• August 14 St. Louis, Missouri
• August 18 & 19 Edmonton, Alberta
• August 23 & 24 Los Angeles, California
• September 1 & 2 San Jose, California
• September 3 Sacramento, California
• September 6 Portland, Oregon
• September 7 Seattle, Washington
• September 10 & 11 Vancouver, British Columbia
• September 16 & 17 Nashville, Tennessee
• September 21 Tulsa, Oklahoma
• September 24 Kansas City, Missouri
• September 27 Denver, Colorado
• September 28 Salt Lake City, Utah
• October 4 Little Rock, Arkansas
• October 5 New Orleans, Louisiana
• October 8 Dallas, Texas

A Royal Frenzy: Tabloids Concoct Coverage of Kate Middleton and Prince William Engagement

What's the only development that will get tabloids in more of a frenzy than rumors of an engagement between Kate Middleton and Prince William? That's easy:
An actual Kate Middleton and Prince William engagement.
Following months of speculation over whether this couple was broken up or already wedding planning, trashy magazines scrambled this week to find some unique angle on the fact that Kate and William are simply happy, together and engaged. Let's see what they came up with:

From stories on the "real" Kate (newsflash: she wears a bikini sometimes!) to inside dish on how Middleton has been molded into a princess, these publications claim to have it all. To wit:

Us Weekly reports Kate has received "royal assistance" for years, including lessons on the paparazzi-filled life of her late mother-in-law, Princess Diana. Says Katie Nicholl, author of "William and Harry: Behind the Palace Walls."

"About three years ago, palace staff started showing Kate video of Diana. Video of her getting out of a car and paparazzi going berserk, so that Kate would know how to deal with it. Now, she already knows how this works."

One of Kate's first lessons in this world: don't speak to tabloids such as Us Weekly.

Randy Quaid: Canada Saved My Life!

Increasingly crazy actor Randy Quaid says if it wasn’t for Canada's refugee system, he and his wife Evi would be dead. Thanks to the star whackers, natch.
Quaid made this comment as he entered his immigration and refugee board hearing in Vancouver, B.C. The couple faces an outstanding warrant in the U.S.
"If it wasn't for Canada's refuge system, my wife and I would be dead," Randy told CKNW Vancouver, adding that he "feels good" despite the drama.

BRINGING THE CRAZY: No one does it like the Quaids.

The strange couple, wanted for squatting in a home they used to own in California, is claiming refugee status because of a bizarre theory that they're in danger.
According to Randy and Evi Quaid, a random, roving gang of hooligans is hell-bent on ruining the lives of and/or murdering famous people such as themselves.
The situation became even stranger after the board determined that Evi Quaid could claim Canadian citizenship because her father was born in Canada.
Today's hearing will establish if Randy may remain in Canada. We sort of hope he can, for his sake, even if it'd be more entertaining if he came home.

Yes, Source Confirms, Kim Kardashian is Dating Gabriel Aubry!

It was more than just a random sighting at a Lakers game, sources say. Kim Kardashian and Gabriel Aubry really are an item!
A couple days after cameras caught the reality star alongside Halle Berry's ex, an insider tells Us Weekly "they met through friends and have been dating a few weeks."

Another person claiming to be in the know elaborated a bit to Life & Style:

"Kim and Gabriel met a few times while they were both in New York, and there was definitely chemistry. But when Kim returned to Los Angeles last Thursday, they really took it to the next level. They went out to dinner, caught the Lakers game and spent time at Kim's house."

This source says Aubry has already met Kim's mother and sisters, all of whom are "wild" about him. We guess there's only one thing left to decide then, readers: Kubry? Gardashian? These two need a nickname, stat!

Fantasia in Court: I Aborted Antwaun Cook's Baby

Fantasia Barrino may possess an incredible voice, but she's known more for her scandal-filled personal life than anything else these days.
The latest bombshell to drop from this former American Idol champion arrives courtesy of her recent court testimony, as Fantastia was a witness in boyfriend Antwaun Cook's divorce proceedings against ex-wife Paula yesterday.
Under oath, Barrino reportedly stated she got pregnant by Cook and had an abortion.

In August, Cook admitted he had been sleeping with the singer, but said Fantasia was unaware he was still married.

That was the focus of a line of questioning in front of a Mecklenburg County Court judge yesterday, as Paula Cook's attorney pressed Barrino on whether or not she knew her boyfriend was still living with his wife during their relationship.

Because reporters were barred from the courtroom, it's unknown exactly what exchange led to Fantasia's admission, but multiple sources told Radar Online she confirmed the abortion and said it took place around the time of her summer suicide attempt.

Antwaun and Paula are in court because they were unable to settle on terms of a divorce through private mediation.

Meanwhile, it's still conceivable that Paula could sue Fantasia over the unusual Alienation of Affection law, which North Carolina still has on the books and which states that an abandoned spouse can file lawsuit against the party responsible for the dissolution of a marriage.

Heidi Montag: "Obsessed" With Plastic Surgery!

Heidi Montag has married Spencer Pratt a bunch of times, but her true love is plastic surgery, and her secret crush was the man who operated on her.
One of the late Dr. Frank Ryan's close friends, Dawn DaLuise, takes issue with Heidi's claim that he pressured her into her hilarious major makeover.
"I believe she had a crush on him," the celebrity plastic surgeon's pal said. "She was romantically obsessed. She saw him as a night in shining armor."

WORK DONE: Dr. Frank Ryan did a number. [Photo: Pacific Coast News]

To hear Heidi Montag tell it now, Dr. Ryan - who died in a car accident after driving off a cliff in Malibu - wanted the poor thing "to be his Barbie doll."
DaLuise said it was Heidi who made the Barbie comment.
"He sent texts and emails saying she wanted to be Barbie, to look exactly like Barbie," DaLuise said, adding that Ryan tried to talk the plastic surgery addict OUT of getting DDD breasts, a brow lift, a nose job, lipo, butt augmentation, etc.
"He presented why he didn't think this was a good idea."
DaLuise shot back at the wife of Spencer Pratt after she trash talked the dead surgeon, suggesting that Heidi, not the late doctor, is merely a publicity seeking opportunist who used the death of Dr. Ryan in a bid to stay famous.
Yup, we can see that.
"They knew she showed up at the office uninvited, and they knew she phoned and he wouldn't take [her] calls," DaLuise said, noting that. "She began that pursuit only after he was rebuking her on a personal and social level."
She said others friends and workers of Dr. Ryan will come forward if she doesn't stop desecrating his memory. Eh, that probably won't stop her.

Kim Kardashian Signs on for Sketchers

Feet may not be the first (or second... or third...) body part that comes to mind when you think of Kim Kardashian, but Sketchers is hoping to change that.
The sneaker company has signed Kim and mother Kris Jenner to endorsement deals. Look for the pair to be featured in a campaign titled "Shaping Up With the Kardashians," a fitness challenge that will serve as this brand's marketing centerpiece in 2011.
Hey, whatever weight loss program that doesn't involve hours on the toilet is a step in the right direction for these people.

For once in her life, Kim Kardashian wants people to look at her feet instead of her chest. [Photos: Splash News]

"Shape-ups have already impacted my fitness routine for the better," Kim said soon after this announcement was made. "I am always on-the-move and never know exactly when I can fit in my next workout."

Adds Skechers Fitness Group President Leonard Amato: "Kim Kardashian and Kris Jenner are aspirational individuals and the perfect spokespeople to inspire women to maximize their fitness level."

Hehe. We're trying not to laugh too hard at any reference to Kim Kardashian as an aspirational individual. Apt word choice, dude.

Jake Pavelka is on Team Bristol Palin

Jake Pavelka, who lasted five weeks last season on Dancing With the Stars, can relate to Bristol Palin. He knows a thing or two about having two left feet.
While Jake's popularity couldn't match Bristol the Pistol, who made to the finals, he says it's great that she lasted this long - and she has a shot tonight.
“It’s a level playing field. The score is zero, zero, zero,” the former Bachelor and Bachelorette star said. “It’s what makes Dancing With the Stars special."

From one bad dancer to another ...

"It really proves that when America votes, it’s what drives the show. It’s just like American Idol, it’s not decided by the judges. It’s decided by America.”
Well, the judges do play a role, as we discussed in our Dancing With the Stars recap earlier. But his point is essentially correct, and Bristol's proof of it.
When asked who his dream star for DWTS would be? "I think Jennifer Love Hewitt should do Dancing With the Stars. She’s a hottie,” Pavelka said.

Charlie Sheen Text Messages Reveal Plans to "Get Ball Rollin" on Payments to Capri Anderson

Advantage Team Capri?
While Charlie Sheen and Capri Anderson wrestle back and forth in the media and in the courtroom - the latest development in the battle between this sitcom and porn star revolves around the former suing the latter for extortion - TMZ has uncovered a slew of text messages that back up at least two of Anderson's claims.

In an interview with ABC that aired yesterday, Capri said Sheen contacted her the day after he allegedly went berzerk inside a NYC hotel room and offered her $20,000 to not tell her side of the story.

She's also cited an expensive purse the actor destroyed during his rampage on the night of October 25. If the following text messages are to believed, exchanges between these two soon after this incident took place do at least confirm these aspects of Anderson's story.

As first published by TMZ, we present a series of texts between Anderson and Sheen from the day after their infamous first day together:

Sheen: "All I need is an Acct number etc and I will wire u 20k if u think that will cover everything ... I really feel bad, u are as cool and sexy and as sweet and fun and friendly as they get!"
Anderson: "u trashed my brand new prada purse dude not cool - how u managed to rip the strap off and put 2 holes in it is beyond me."
Sheen: "Don't worry about our mutual friends, deal with me directly and I promise u kind lady, all will be restored and set straight."
Anderson: "Yes u can call me.  I don't have a bank account believe it or not."
Sheen: "Oh, well in that case, lemme put together a plan to get u square and flush.  Can u tok (sic) for a sec now sweetie?"
Sheen: "Good news!  My asst Rick is good friends with a cat named Mark in NY, he will get the wire, cash that bitch, and deliver it to u where ever it's convenient ... I'll get the ball Rollin in am, and have data for u asap after that...
Anderson: "Can he leave it somewhere secure for me to pick up?  Like with a bank rep ... I'm rlly nervous about all this."
Sheen: "Of course, whatever makes u feel better... Lemme start that ball Rollin and I'll get back to u with the details..."

Kim Zolciak: Angling for a Spin-Off?

Kim Zolciak is pregnant. But instead of seeing first steps and adorable giggles in her future, this Real Housewife can only see one thing: dollar signs.
Insiders tell Radar Online that Kim wants to follow the Bethenny Frankel model of ditching one show for the grander opportunity of starring in a spin-off that would follow her and boyfriend Kroy Biermann as they prepare for parenthood.
There's nothing like using a fetus as a bargaining chip, is there?

If Kim Zolciak is given her own show, can she at least be barred from singing on it?

"Kim knows that having this baby represents a great opportunity and she is already in talks about her own reality show spin-off starring Kroy," a source says. "This would represent a real problem for Real Housewives of Atlanta because they wanted her baby and any wedding for their show... it will all come down to money."
Ah, the joys of expecting motherhood.

Oksana's Bodyguard: Mel Wanted Me Dead! DEAD!

Mel Gibson wanted Oksana Grigorieva's bodyguard, Kristian Herzog, murdered ... well, at least according to the uber-shady dude's last will and testament.
Radar Online found the document somehow, as well as emails Herzog - a twice-convicted felon who claims he put it to Oksana - sent her this fall.
"I fear that Mel Gibson may try and have me murdered," he wrote in the will.

This just gets weirder by the day.

"I was told that my actions supporting Oksana Grigorieva have greatly disturbed Mel Gibson and he has made comments about having me killed."
Seriously, dude, murder? We all know Mel has anger issues up the wazoo, but you expect us to believe he wanted to TAKE YOUR LIFE? Please.
The murder-for-hire plot is the latest shocking charge from Kristian Herzog, who claimed he and Grigorieva were romantically involved this year.
He calls Grigorieva "my best friend in the world" in the will, in which leaves "100% of any and all that I own or control" to ... Oksana, obviously.
He also touted the reasons why the actor wanted him killed, namely that he had four mistresses who Kristian Herzog had been trying to expose.
"I am also the one that has been trying to get all of Mel Gibson's 4 other mistresses (NOT V.K.) and former staff to come forward and tell the truth about how Gibson assaulted and abused Oksana Grigorieva and her children," Herzog wrote.
V.K. was an apparent reference to Polish porn star Violet Kowal, who claimed she had a steamy three-month love affair with Gibson in Malibu.
That was right around the time of Mel's infamous blowout with Oksana in early 2010. Grigorieva has recently charged that Mel cheated on her.
Herzog also claimed he and Grigorieva felt her lawyers "were working in concert with Mel Gibson's attorneys and NOT looking out for [Oksana]."
He said: "Although I have NO plan to ever take my own life, I am writing this my last will and testament just in case Mel Gibson has me killed."
Continue reading this Radar Online revelation ...

Sarah Palin Defends Dancing With the Stars Voting, Brushes Off "Haters"

With the judges' scores comprising half the total, Bristol Palin needs a surge of voter support to overcome Jennifer Grey's lead and win Dancing with the Stars.
Can she do it? Ask Audrina Patridge or Brandy if they doubt her fans' ability to pull her through. Bristol's march to the final week has been something to behold.
It's surprised some fans so much that there's been talk of vote-rigging, but her mother, former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, dismisses all conspiracy theories.

“The producers of Dancing With the Stars are explaining over and over again, there’s no way to cheat the system,” Sarah said. “But the haters are going to hate."
"Bristol has said it best. Bristol has said, ‘Mom, it doesn’t matter what we do, we’re going to get criticized anyway, so we might as well just dance.” So, so true.
The mother of Bristol and Willow Palin said, “You’re right, honey, you might as well dance, fly, and soar and speak about issues that are important to this country."
"We might as well do it, and we’ll take that criticism, because we know that, at the end of the day, truly, being committed to a cause is worth it.”
What cause she's talking about is subject to interpretation, but how inspirational. Anyway, does Bristol Palin deserve to be in the DWTS finals?